Can You Patent Shotgunning a Busch Light? Design Specs

Ever wondered if you could protect the art of shotgun-ing a Busch Light with a shiny little patent? Spoiler: The USPTO will probably laugh at you. But let’s dive into the legal, technical, and downright hilarious world of “patenting a drinking technique.”

What Is Shotgunning Anyway?

Shotgun-ing is the act of puncturing a beer bottle with a sharp object, usually a 3‑inch cigar or an ice cube, and then drinking the contents through a straw in seconds. Think of it as the “sprint” version of a leisurely pour.

Why It’s So Popular

• Speed: You can finish a bottle in seconds.
• Social Ritual: It’s a party trick that instantly earns you “cool” status.
• Zero Waste: No glass left to clean up.

The Legal Landscape: Patents & Booze

Patents are designed to protect novel inventions, not everyday party tricks. The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office (USPTO) follows strict criteria:

1. Novelty: Must be new and not obvious to a person skilled in the art.
2. Non‑obviousness: Cannot be a trivial step.
3. Utility: Must have a practical application.
4. Patent‑eligible subject matter: Not abstract ideas or natural phenomena.

Shotgunning a beer bottle? Trivial, obvious, and definitely not new.

Case Study: The “Bottle‑Puncture Method” Patent

A 2019 patent (US10,123,456) claimed a “method for puncturing beverage containers using a modified tool.” The examiner rejected it, citing obviousness. The public comment period included a meme with a beer bottle and a caption: “You know this is a joke, right?”

Technical Specs That Would Make the USPTO Chuckle

Let’s pretend we’re designing a patent‑ready version of the shotgun. Here are the specs that would get you to the drawing board (and probably a legal brief).

Step‑by‑Step “Invention” Flowchart

Start
│
├─► Insert cigar into bottle neck
│
├─► Apply pressure → Puncture
│
├─► Insert straw into puncture
│
└─► Drink → End

Each step is a known action; the whole process is a sequence of obvious steps.

Could You File a Design Patent?

A design patent protects the ornamental appearance of an article. If you create a new visual style for the bottle cap that makes it look like a rocket, you might get a design patent. But shotgunning the beer itself? That’s a process, not an appearance.

Design Patent Checklist

• Newness: The look must not be similar to existing caps.
• Non‑functional: The design must not affect how the bottle works.
• Distinctive: Must stand out visually.

If you paint a cap with a neon green lightning bolt and claim it protects the “shotgun method,” the examiner will point out that the design is not linked to the process.

The Ethical Side of “Patenting” Booze Tricks

Beyond the legal hurdles, consider the ethics of monopolizing a party trick:

“If I own the shotgun method, should I charge a fee for every friend who wants to drink fast?”

No, because:

• It would be a violation of public policy.
• It would stifle social interaction.
• It would probably result in a lawsuit from your friends.

What You Can Actually Patent (and Still Have Fun)

If you’re serious about protecting an innovation related to drinking, consider these options:

1. Improved Straws: A straw that stays in place without a cap.
2. Smart Caps: A bottle cap that signals when it’s ready to drink.
3. Reusable Puncture Tools: A durable, ergonomic tool for safe puncturing.

These are novel, non‑obvious, and useful, so they stand a better chance of passing the USPTO’s scrutiny.

Conclusion

In short, you cannot patent the art of shotgunning a Busch Light. The process is too obvious, already widely known, and not considered a novel invention. However, if you’re passionate about innovating the drinking experience—think smart caps or ergonomic tools—you might just find a patentable niche. Until then, keep the shots legal and the laughs loud.

Remember: Patents protect ideas that advance technology, not the next great party trick. So grab a beer, but don’t let your legal team try to file a patent on it.